Homesickness

If we part our ways, I will always keep looking for you wherever I go.
I wonder if you think about me as much as I think about you.
Often feeling empty, a deep void that can’t let me sleep.
I cannot deny that your absence made me feel lost yet not for the first time.

While walking in the streets, I feel I keep hallucinating,
The fair and precise resemblance of your face,
Short hairs covering half eye and every scar that you kept secret,
All comes into life, so to remind me, this is not you.

I wouldn’t want to runaway from my thoughts alone,
If only you could leave me entirely, if only I would let you go.
It is painful, but it tastes like freshly brewing nostalgia with every sunset,
A homesickness that is beyond repair.

~Navaparna

Day 6 of Na/GloPoWriMo 2023.

Prompt 6 source: https://www.napowrimo.net/poets-start-your-engines/
Today’s (optional) prompt is again drawn from our archives, and builds off our daily resource. Take a look around Poetry International for a poem in a language you don’t know. For example, I grabbed this one in Finnish by Olli Heikkonen. Now, read the poem to yourself, thinking about the sound and shape of the words, and the degree to which they remind you of words in your own language. Use those correspondences as the basis for a new poem.

For today’s prompt I have no idea what my poem seems like. It is just so totally different than that of the prompt’s directed poem, but for my today’s muse I have chosen- Demain, dès l’aube by Victor Hugo. I was deeply attached with this poem after I read the translation, it has left me emotional for an hour now. I have realised, both the poems does have some kind of similarity, not in the structure but perhaps the deep rooted attachment, silent emotions, some unrecovered loss and the strong memory that leads to nostalgia.

Demain, dès l’aube

Demain, dès l’aube, à l’heure où blanchit la campagne,
Je partirai. Vois-tu, je sais que tu m’attends.
J’irai par la forêt, j’irai par la montagne.
Je ne puis demeurer loin de toi plus longtemps.

Je marcherai les yeux fixés sur mes pensées,
Sans rien voir au dehors, sans entendre aucun bruit,
Seul, inconnu, le dos courbé, les mains croisées,
Triste, et le jour pour moi sera comme la nuit.

Je ne regarderai ni l’or du soir qui tombe,
Ni les voiles au loin descendant vers Harfleur,
Et quand j’arriverai, je mettrai sur ta tombe
Un bouquet de houx vert et de bruyère en fleur.

Picture credit- Pinterest

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“My tears ricochet”

It was 30th of September
years long from today.
Right before falling of dusk,
during a twilight I was born.
Papa mocks about newborn me,
says on the day I took birth,
I bitterly cried throughout the night
And neither did I sleep nor did I
let my father sleep. He took me in his lap,
and swing me, yet I didn’t stop shrieking.
I wonder if that was the only day
I relentlessly cried, incessantly.
Because till now, in my teens
I haven’t probably cried for that long.
Possibly because I’m shielding my insecurities,
strengthening my weakness, shunning disconcertment,
curbing all pent-up worries, anxiety and depression,
escaping from raging fear but it never leaves swiftly.
So as days passes by, we learn to cope with them,
we grow through it but we don’t let our fears enslave us.
Inspite of having a soft, timid side of me that is vulnerable
I never showed my tears in presence of people, nobody.
And my parents believes in me, their daughter is “strong”.
I always say to them, “I’m!” so as to let them stop worrying
about me, but they haven’t seen all the cursed nights,
their daughter has to go through so many mental breakdowns.
As, in the morning they always found a smiling face in me.
I kept brooding over the paradoxical view points,
of what my parents think I am and what I am in reality.
I got birth, crying but I don’t wish to die crying.
My tears are precious. They are our sterling strength.
And I wonder if my parents ever noticed my enigmatic smile.
For which even my tears ricochet.

~an impromptu poem for #NaPoWriMo day 29

Prompt Day 29: And here’s our prompt (optional, as always). In certain versions of the classic fairytale Sleeping Beauty, various fairies or witches are invited to a princess’s christening, and bring her gifts. One fairy/witch, however, is not invited, and in revenge for the insult, lays a curse on the princess. Today, I’d like to challenge you to write a poem in which you muse on the gifts you received at birth — whether they are actual presents, like a teddy bear, or talents – like a good singing voice – or circumstances – like a kind older brother, as well as a “curse” you’ve lived with (your grandmother’s insistence on giving you a new and completely creepy porcelain doll for every birthday, a bad singing voice, etc.). I hope you find this to be an inspiring avenue for poetic and self-exploration. https://www.napowrimo.net/day-twenty-nine-8/

The title of this poem is taken from a song by Taylor swift, very much my favorite. Although the lyrics doesn’t match with my poem’s intention but, since I like the title so I applied it in my poem and to my surprise it went through pretty coolly. Oh yes I literally cried terribly during the first night and from then onwards maybe my parents can’t recognise my tears lol. I mean I do not cry easily, and how embarrassing it is to cry in front of people, especially in front of my parents! I just can’t. And hiding away pain is quite natural though, as we don’t want them to worry about us but repressing these awful rage and bottling up conflicting emotions is even more dangerous. We must share with them, if not parents then friends prolly. Water in our body needs a way out, so may it be sweat or tears or pee it gets out eventually. Anyway, its penultimate day of Na/GloPoWriMo 2022 and just one day left! We’ll be back to our mundane lives and wait for the next year, wow it was all fun game! Well I’m really going to miss my readers for some time and specially the actively engaging participants of NaPoWriMo challenge. Have a good day.

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“Mångata”

One of the
celestial illuminous
organ that emits its own
light and is considered Earth’s
only natural satellite, is our beloved moon.
It’s glittery reflection on lofty waves of ocean
creates a sublime effect under the dark night sky,
something is bewitching with the orb of night, pleasing
panorama, emerging from horizon, sometime after the twilight,
shimmering moonlight falling into Earth’s crust, a delightful
exhilarating vantage point, that if anyone passes through the coastline,
it it obvious to easily get lured to gaze into that beautiful sight.

~an impromptu poem for #NaPoWriMo day 28

Prompt Day 28: Today’s prompt is to write a concrete poem. Like acrostic poems, concrete poems are a favorite for grade-school writing assignments, so this may not be your first time at the concrete-poem rodeo. In brief, a concrete poem is one in which the lines are shaped in a way that mimics the topic of the poem. For example, May Swenson’s poem “Women” mimics curves, reinforcing the poem’s references to motion, rocking horses, and even the shape of a woman’s body. George Starbuck’s “Sonnet in the Shape of a Potted Christmas Tree” is – you guessed it – a sonnet in the shape of a potted Christmas tree. Your concrete poem could be complexly-shaped, but relatively simple strategies can also be “concrete” —  like a poem involving a staircase where the length of the lines grows or shrinks over time, like an ascending (or descending) set of stairs. https://www.napowrimo.net/day-twenty-eight-8/

Mångata is a sweet word from Swedish language which means reflection of moon light on water. Defined by the Glosbe Swedish-English dictionary as ‘the roadlike reflection of moonlight on water‘, this word refers to the long, glimmering reflection of the moon on a (usually large) body of water, which resembles a shining street or road.

Thus, using this beautiful term my concrete form of poetry has been done. Just like the reflection on waves of water creates a ravishing scene, whether in ocean or pond or any other water bodies, I used the description to create my poem and it was quite fun! Just a minor inconvenience due to the alignment of texts, but it is somewhat like the waves of ocean I suppose. Do let me know your thoughts on this.

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“Parallel Universe”

I want to be armoured
around those cozy arms.
To feel the warmth and
a chance to be in love
again. Touch and feel,
desire to belong
someone’s someone,
feeling is back again.
Long time, hues of
numbness heard
lots of sorrows lamenting.
Guard the pillars of
my weakness and shield
them with thy strength.
A fraction of fiction
gives birth to ample
of hope. It seems
I can’t cope. Defy me
with faithless insight of
love and I won’t die again,
not at least in parallel universe.

~an impromptu poem for #NaPoWriMo day 23

Prompt Day 23: Today I’d like to challenge you to write a poem in the style of Kay Ryan, whose poems tend to be short and snappy – with a lot of rhyme and soundplay. They also have a deceptive simplicity about them, like proverbs or aphorisms. Once you’ve read a few, you’ll see what I mean. Here’s her “Token Loss,” “Blue China Doorknob,” “Houdini,” and “Crustacean Island.” https://www.napowrimo.net/day-twenty-three-8/

Love Parallel Universe things. Unreal, hunger of hope fulfilment, achievement for longing dreams and wishes, uncovering unjust opinions or actions, where unrealistic expectations come true, discovering new paths to enhance better and deserving life, occurrence of fortuitous things undefined by time and actions, just everything happening just the way we wish no matter how much wrong or unlawful it seems. So according to what one thinks can happen easily? The hypothetical self-contained plane of existence is living in our unconscious mind perhaps and if we ever find the existence of multiverse, then all are answers would be accessible retrieving a way to our unconscious mind. Well that’s just what I think. lol! Nevermind. Hope you enjoyed today’s prompt based poem! Love you all… Feel free to comment down there…

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“Healing yet Hurting”

Five answers to the same question (as the prompt suggests) in the form of poem (I’ve chosen haiku for the same).

I
I’m sure it won’t hurt
You’re poised to reap what’ve sowed.
Acknowledge perhaps.

II
Ask yourself questions
If this is what you’ve asked for?
Or did you deserved.

III
Mourning in silence
Only to stifle the pain?
Sure not wise enough.

IV
Dawning of changes
Hiding or running away?
Call it to quit hereafter.

V
You’re not alone
Nothingness can’t hide itself
The void will pass anon.

~an impromptu poem (in haiku form) for #NaPoWriMo day 18

Prompt Day 18: Today’s prompt is based on Faisal Mohyuddin’s poem “Five Answers to the Same Question.” Today, I’d like to challenge you to write your own poem that provides five answers to the same question – without ever specifically identifying the question that is being answered. https://www.napowrimo.net/day-eighteen-8/

I’m so proud how it turned out into really one of my favourite piece now! Clearly it says it all… Hiding, escaping, isolating, running away, grieving, acknowledging, facing consequences, suffering, hurting and also healing. These are some of the things we all commit to in the course of life yet some of these emotions and actions get attached and do not try to leave easily and it is painful yes, but overcoming these might feel like dashing into freedom. We always want joy and smiles everywhere but some smiles are just unwell pretense to some tragic situations one might have faced and are undeniably the crestfallen part of life. Still, life goes and on and on and we need to go on and on.

Damnn this is a moment of fulfilment. Hope you like it as well!

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‘Learn to compromise’

Well, this topic has a broader explanation and perhaps I have explained ¼ of it. Though give it a read. I have shared a brief account of the happenings from my life, an analytical description. And I believe, almost all human beings have to compromise in one or the other way, have to compromise once in life. And without compromising once, they must had to or have to embrace failure. And this is what I wrote is partially from my experiences after failure or lack of compromising attitude and hence in several ways I had to confront my failures in various ways. So I tried to express my feelings towards this phrase, Learn to compromise. Hope this article help…

Learning to compromise isn’t difficult if we develop ‘patience’ and successively ‘peace’ will dominate our mind and can control any challenging situation. When we learn to compromise, life becomes easy… Similar to one emotional saying, “It is better to put a fake smile, rather than explaining the reason why you were crying”. But that doesn’t mean, we should hold on our sorrows tightly within our self, crying to the deepest… Share your feelings, which will make you feel relief, you could barely tie some of them, remaining sensations will spontaneously flow, and roll down along with your tears. You can’t stop! And I say, no need to compromise holding your feelings inside you.

At first, ‘Learn to compromise’ includes; admitting your mistakes! The most important and commonly understood definition of the above phrase. And several times it has been proved that this definition is correct. Understanding a minute misunderstanding is visibly acceptable and refurbishing relations makes quite prodigious adjustment and it is highly appreciable. That proves that the person or the relation is more important than his or her ‘ego’! And this is highly useful in relationships, nowadays. The second point goes, understanding people’s mind when they try to convey any kind messages. This can be done precociously; by keenly taking a note of their words or actions, should catch out by observing their instincts. Try it in a meek way… Third way to acquire this, is to clear your negativity and bring positive vibes into your life which will surely make you feel remarkably better and successful also during your hard times. Negative thinking is unhealthy and it cause mental pressure, damaging your brain cells affecting in numerous ways (depends upon person-to-person, different needs for different people). Take deep breaths, smile when you are angry and start doing something you love to do(my advice is to better sleep, or forcefully try to sleep, use headphones for playing your favourite music, it will start dominating your anger and is quite beneficial as a healing therapy ), it keeps ‘positivity’ flowing through your veins and thus controls anger. It helps, and also improves your emotional level to affect strongly while dealing with mental stability. Hence, it builds up fresh energy or you can ‘dynamism’ to resume your daily activities. Try to minimize conflicts with people around you (includes each person you meet in a day). Fourthly, avoid Prejudice Judgements (also, by another name is preconception or assumptions!) while in matters related with friends, family and in terms of relationship too. Stabilise conflicts through understanding in a calm environment. If the other person doesn’t listen, or lose patience then the speaker should stay quiet. And let the other person realize, your silence! Or give them some time and space but don’t disturb them until they recover into normal state. The fifth, the last but not the least, it is not necessary that ‘sacrifice’ has to be equal to ‘compromise’. But at times, these two words combine and emerge to form a concrete concept known as ‘selfless struggle’. In a simple definition, ‘Learn to compromise’, means to give up something one wants, in order to reach an agreement (Google it in case you are not sure). Settling a dispute by mutual concession. A responsibility requited in a suitable manner, by understanding or by accepting all the jazz.

We just need to learn when to keep quiet and when to speak. Say ‘sorry’ when needed (realizing our mistake at first) and we shall learn to adjust with difficult situation, whatever life provides. Understand situations and try to discuss in a calm way, instead of complaining about each other, in terms of relationship but also include family discussion or conversation with any people. These are some of the possible ways we can learn to compromise.

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